Was walking past the living room in my daughter’s house when I heard a sweet voice from my granddaughter’s tablet singing, “If you hurt someone today, say you’re sorry right away!” I nodded approvingly. Yes, good manners. Good values. But do we need to say sorry all the time?
And that’s when it struck me—maybe it’s time we adults revisit a few nursery rhymes ourselves.
After all, in this age of public outrage and historic guilt, we seem to be going on a worldwide apology tour. Countries are issuing statements of regret for events that happened centuries ago, sometimes with tears and trembling lower lips that could win Oscars. “We’re sorry,” they say. For what? For being what the world was at that time!
Now, don’t get me wrong. “Sorry” is a good word—when used in the right place and time. But today, it’s being thrown around like confetti at a political rally. Everyone’s apologizing for something their great-grandparents might have done. The USA keeps saying sorry for winning against the native Indians, Australia for the treatment of its Aboriginal people, and here in India, we’re still nursing a grudge against the British, blaming them for everything, and the word ‘colonial’ is brandished like a sword.
But here’s the thing—apologizing for history is like scolding your grandfather for not using Google Maps. They didn’t know better. The world was different. Their understanding of right and wrong was shaped by their time, not ours.
Yes, there were injustices. Yes, colonialism hurt. But do we move forward by constantly pointing fingers at ghosts? Or by acknowledging the past, learning from it, and building something better?
If America and Australia truly want to fix things, they should stop with symbolic sorries and start with meaningful change—equal opportunities, better education, stronger communities. And as for us Indians, maybe it’s time we stop blaming Lord Curzon and Robert Clive for every pothole on our road and ask our corporator what he’s doing today.
There’s a story of Jesus on the cross saying, “Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.” That wasn’t just about mercy. Maybe we can take it as a blueprint to look at history—with understanding. Not with rage. Not with guilt. And certainly not with a megaphone and hashtags.
Instead of all this historic hand-wringing, maybe we need to say something simpler: “They didn’t know better. But we do now.” And that, my friends, is not an apology—it’s growth.
So, let’s keep teaching our kids to say sorry, especially when they spill juice on someone’s white shirt or break the neighbour’s flowerpot. But as grown-ups, let’s also teach them when not to say it or ask for it—because wisdom is knowing when to apologize, and when to simply learn, forgive, and move on.
Sometimes, it’s not about being sorry, it’s about being better..!